top of page
  • Writer's pictureJessica Joines

Healing First, Happiness Second

Updated: May 30, 2021

Two things are true. First, the spiritual journey we are ALL on is learning how to master our perception. Master your perception and you master your reality. We practice doing this in an incredibly dense and fear-driven world. But overtime, we can learn how to see what IS, more than what ISN’T. As when we quiet our minds and re-wire our brains through practices like meditation, we learn to see love more than we do fear.

But the second thing that’s true is we also come here to heal. Learning powerful, yet painful lessons along the way. Which can be tricky, especially with many new thought teachings, like the Law of Attraction. For knowing when to focus on positive thinking versus doing the messy work of inner healing can be confusing for some. But it’s simpler than you might think.

The answer is that there is no separation between the two, per se.

So let’s break it down. Learning to master your perception is an exercise is learning how to see love, when fear is seemingly present. It’s about shifting your mindset from lack to abundance. Or even more simply, seeing the positive (what IS) more than you see what’s wrong or missing. It’s finding the truth, love and healing that is present in every moment, even the painful ones — until you reach a point where initial impact is minimal. Because you have so completely shifted HOW and WHAT you see.

(Note, it’s usually about then that your work here is done!)

Once you master THIS, your journey of healing comes near completion. Because you will be so shifted into the frequency of love and light, that you’ll meet every moment — no matter what is it — with gratitude and acceptance. But this is many, many lifetimes of work.

So let’s get back to the present reality where 99% of us are at.

When we have not yet mastered our perception, we experience pain and trauma. And the opportunity therefore becomes to heal this pain. In part, through shifting how you perceive “what happened” to you. And also by really feeling into it.

You have to feel the pain to release the pain. But what you want to be careful of is being so invested in your pain or keeping a certain reoccurring storyline alive that you don’t release it; which is your job. Your goal is to release it, not hold onto it (e.g., I am a victim versus I was a victim)!

This is where it gets confusing for a lot of people. So here’s the answer. Don’t focus on “changing the storyline” until you’ve done ALL the healing work. What I see happening is people trying to shift their perception; or teachers teaching the idea of perception shift, before you’ve fully grieved and released. Instead, you want to sit in the darkness and FEEL all the pain. You want to let it all out. Only then can you move into the important work of shifting you perception about the experience itself.

Here are some steps and guidance to follow:

  • Don’t shy away from pain. Confront, address and tackle head on like it’s your job! You have to feel it to release it. When you don’t you keep it stored in you, attracting more of the same. So focus on the brave work of letting go.

  • Find the love, following the healing. This part is hard, but I promise it’s part of the journey. That is to find the good — the positive in this painful experience. How did this experience help you deepen your soul growth and journey? Hang onto THAT and when / if you revisit the experience, choose to see this.

  • Rewrite your storyline. Take what you’ve learned through this shift in perception to rewrite any storylines in your life that need rewriting. Allow your intuition to guide you on this one. Knowing that as you do, you shape the next moments that are upon you.

At the end of the day, you never want to repress anything that has yet to be healed. Trust that as you do this heavy lifting — you’re daily shift to perceiving love, more than you do fear — will organically happen over time. There’s a place for conscious intention and practice. But when it becomes a struggle or something that feels forced, know you are likely out of alignment.


Recent Posts

See All


bottom of page